Morphine Dreams

The next few days all blur together, a time I like to call 'The Morphine Dream'. Only they weren't really dreams, were they? More like nightmares. Night Terrors.
The morphine dreams are what everybody laughs about. There were so many funny stories. All the people that visit me talk about the morphine dreams.
There was turtle sex. When I cried out, "Oh my God, that man is having sex with a turtle!!!"
I called my sister and my cousin 'drunken bitches' as they walked in to visit me.
The time I thought I was in a Chinese restaurant and my brother was the waiter.
I could only drink water through a sponge, and referred to the nurses as 'my sponge bitches'. I was so thirsty that I told my sister i would french kiss her just for the water in her mouth.
Through the haze of morphine I was still able to tell my cousin not to get the heebee-jeebies from being in a hospital while I was being wheeled past him in my bed.
Every time I laugh along listening to people recall the stories and morphine dreams, a part of me shuts down. Inwardly I shudder as memories I have suppressed resurface. The morphine dreams were funny thoughts and silly hallucinations. The nightmares though, they were different. They weren't funny. No one knows the extent of those nightmares. I try not to think about those days, never mind talk about them. The nightmares were hallucinations from the morphine too, and some of the worst memories I'll ever have.